BASIC INFO

(please note all data on this page is subject to change)

Real name: Hope Harmonic
Gender:male
Race:Miqo'te
Clan:keepers of the moon
AGE:25
nameday:Unknown
Marital Status:Single
Citizienship:Gridania
Place of Birth:Unknown

"Shut up"
~shadow

A male miqo'te,who is normally blunt and serious like to friends and enemy alike. he is a strong willed Miqo'te who is a tactical genus and a brutal fighter. he often become annoyed easily and only greet people that seems interesting to him. because of this the people he meets are normally "odd" in most people eyes but his own
His voice is Deep,but calm in most cases but can become loud and aggressive if he is angered. he acts like a careless man to all but always keep good manners to random females,he takes orders easily but only if he accepts them because of this he sometimes have fights with the leaders or generals of grand company's and groups of adventurers. he keep his emotions in check and appers to have a blank face but only when he is deep in though. his Odd behavior make some people fear that he'll attack them with no reason but he only fights and kills people and creatures with a valid reason only
he was abandoned at birth and taken cared for by a group of hyurs intell he ran away when he was 10 feeling that he didn't belong there. He taveled for months but wasnt able to keep going and soon found himself on the brink of death. When he awaoke he was in Gridania. A young girl was standing before him calming she had save his live and wanted to take care of him. though she also said to him that if he do refuse most likely he'll end up dead. hearing this he desired to stay learning the city live and gaining formal training from other hunters. 12 years passed and the girl who took care off him passed away do to a unknown sickness. after her death he wondered the city normally alone doing jobs for people and living in a old hut he built outside of the city but it wasn't enough. he wanted to prove to people that he was more then a boy who got lucky. he soon joined the lancer guild. though it was months and years of hardships he was able to go through it all.

APPEARANCE

Height: not really tall
Weight:Skinny and light
Complexion:brown skinned
Hair:Short laid back spiky hair, that have a Dark brown color
Eyes: Fire Red
facial features: Black tattoos on both sides of his face, and a scar above his nose
Voice:Light low voice, that can have a friendly or aggressive tone
Clothing style:Most the time he is seen with Light Armor or leather gear, it can be the colors of red,black, and or yellow.

TASTES

Hobbies: Hunting,Weaving,Cutting wood,Training on a Wooden Dummy
Likes:Flowers,Grassy areas,Nighttime,Helping others.Staring at the sea,Music
Dislikes:,Getting lost,using magic,Overcrowded areas

Color:Black
Food:Everything but moogle pie
Scent:Maple trees,Flowers,Fresh Cut wood,
Place:Girdania
Goals:To honor his mother's last wish,To become well known
Alignment: Chaotic Good, He can normally do things with good reasons but in a cruel way
Name Meaning: Hope Harmonica is the name he was given at age 11 by his mother Elliselle Harmonica, who Officially adopted him.
Nickname: Shadow (Is is known by his nickname)

PERSONALTY

Shadow is a Kind heart boy but don't really show it. He seems rough and emotionless at first glance, but really isn't that bad of a guy. Shadow is normally cautious when he hunts or do dangerous actives. He has little patience with people who are bugging him and become angered quickly. He is a loyal man who don't question his orders unless they feel wrong. He normally would be found out hunting or helping a group of adventures.

FLAWS:Short temper,Get confused to often,short attention span when annoyed
Fears:Spiders,Ghost,undead,getting his tail cut off
Talents:Hunting,Weaving,Wood Crafting,Firewood gathering,Battling

Trainings

Learned to weld weapons at a young age,Many hunter teachings and trainings, Solider training, he also is fond of using heavy swords from a young experience but don't really use them no more
can wield~
Lances
Bows
Greatswords (Future patch)

OTHER NOTES

(OOC) just wanted to say that i'am glad to be here and i use kenjii style to list my bio(i dumbed it down a bit) so thanks for that and i hope to have a great time here P.S
i use a Ps3 (PSN X5-shadow)

Disclamer and history

Family
(Before Calamity)
Mother: Hanna Stone (Unknown)
Father" Meryal Stone (Unknown)
Brother: Jayden Stone (Alive)
sister: Aelitha Stone (Alive)
(After Calamity)
Mother:Ellsielle Harmonic (Dead)
Father:(None)
Brother:(none)
Sister:(none)

History

Childhood
http://tales-of-hydaelyn.guildwork.com/forum/posts/52594d4bc16e4d14e22ab69e


(after Calamity)
Shadow awoke in Gridania confused, and worried of how he managed to find himself there, unable to remember his past as much, he goes to town finding out that no one remembers him, and that his mother died 5 years ago, heartbroken and lost, he turns to the only hope he has to find out what happen in the last 5 years, the lancer's guild

Alright, I am going to try to be gentle here. So bear with me; this is meant to be constructive. Everything I've observed about you, hints very highly that you're a beginner roleplayer when it comes to structured, high-lore settings. Which is fine, everyone starts out somewhere. I'm picking this apart now, with love and understanding. This is very much a first/rough draft profile, so we're going to critique and hopefully help you through the process of making a character you'll love and others will want to RP with.

Once you get this all nice and polished up, we'll erase all the critiques and you'll have something fresh and shiny.

You'll see me use the word "lore" or "canon". Sometimes alone, sometimes together. I'm not going to go into dictionary definitions (feelin' lazy here), but under these conditions the terms refer to concepts that are fact within the setting. Things that the developers that worked on the story have deemed official. Also, research. Sandbox-RP environments where everything and anything goes, research isn't really needed. In a setting where there is a definite structure, you need to research.

So, let's get this started, shall we? We'll hit the FF-specific things first.

First off, and perhaps biggest issue… Miqo'te are, by lore, a race with feline features, not canine/lupine/vulpine/any other animal. And while there -may- be a possibility for the five races to interbreed (feeling lazy today, so I'm not going to lore-crawl for an ironclad 'yes' or 'no' on the matter), there is no breeding between the humanoid races and animals. The 'fluffy' tail option during character creation should not be taken to mean that there is canon-lore room to make a lupine Miqo'te; this tail is in-line with "long hair" cat breeds (Angoras, Persians, Ragdolls, Maine Coons, etc.). Lore, behaviors, and emotes for Miqo'te are all based on a feline influence and there is also the Developer's statements that all FFXIV races are updated/inspired by the FFXI races, and the FFXI-equivalent race (Mithra) are unquestionably feline.

Second, you seem to want to have a character that has alpha traits. For this, I would suggest changing and going with a Seekers theme, not a Keepers. Even if your character spent many years alone and was not raised by other Miqo'te, I foresee many problems with your character interacting with other Keepers because Keepers are HIGHLY matriarchal. If you are not prepared for conflicts with alpha Keeper females, you will want to reconsider this choice.

Beyond this, and I give this advice to everyone: study the official lore. Study for your race (both natural and adopted; a Miqo'te raised by Hyur would also have some Hyur influences even if they ran away at a young age). Study the lore for the cities you want to call home. Study your class lore. My character won't be testing you later (she's too dumb), but someone else might.

So now, the non-FF-related things:

If you're looking to do a character with "wolfish behaviors", I would have to suggest that you read up on wolf behavior from reputable sources dating 1980 and newer (texts from before 1980 often paint wolves as horrible killing machines). To save you a little time on this, though, I'll toss in a few things to consider: wolves are highly sociable animals, and their strength is in their pack. Their nature makes them want to be -part- of a pack; a pack provides security, aid when injured, and help hunting. In the wild a lone wolf is, actually, a pathetic thing; they are either forced out because of pack for behavior transgressions, illness, or because it is an alpha that was overthrown. Unless they are able to integrate back into a pack (always as the lowest ranking member) or form a new pack by joining with other loners (these rarely last due to territory fights), a lone wolf rarely lives more than a few seasons. They tend to be sickly, malnourished, and skittish.
–Applying "Wolfish" behavior to characters, you get two types: Packmates (incredibly loyal to their group, wouldn't think to do anything without them,capable of great feats, and if they posses the most amount of charisma, personal strength, and respect they become Leaders), or Lone Wolves (insecure and often make statements about "I don't want anything to do with anyone" while all the while deep-down they have a want to belong, and often only realize their full potential/strength when the realize that they HAVE somehow acquired a pack)

Wild children: A wild child character can be fun, but a lot of research is required, and they are complicated. An abandoned child that had little-to-no contact/nurturing from humans from birth would be completely feral in behaviors; limited capacity for speech, have an aversion to clothing, not potty trained (not housebroken in general), and have no ability to use anything but the most simple tools. In modern-day terms, you'd be dealing with a caveman (a good example, watch "Iceman". A child who received nurturing for a portion of their young lives, you would end up with something more like a Mowgli-type. Feral but able to adapt back into society, but would be very much ill-at-ease with anything civilized (watch this version of "The Jungle Book", but keep in mind that the process that took maybe a month in the movie to reintegrate Mowgli into society, realistically takes years). Added to it, the survival skills for a ten-year-old to survive without any assistance are not typically taught to children, and haven't been part of what is taught to children for almost two thousand years in real life (native/primitive/aboriginal peoples excluded). Either road, though, wild children are very rare. Adults themselves, unless they receive specific training for it, have a hard time going wild and often don't survive more than a week before exposure kills then. Watch a few episodes of Survivorman (don't bother with Bear Grylls, he's a hack), you'll get a small idea.
– The game itself reflects a more early Renaissance-era atmosphere. A child growing up in this era would, at ten years old and living with a family unit, perhaps know a few types of edible berries and have been taught how to draw a bow and maybe have shot a few small animals. If they were lucky, how to make and keep a fire. Cleaning a kill, preservation and storage of food, tanning hides and clothing construction, construction of weapons and adequate shelter, however, would be outside their grasp of knowledge. Realistically, a fifteen-year-old would be hard-pressed to survive a single cold/lean season with no assistance. A ten-year-old with no assistance would most likely die.

The wild-child angle also influences another area: lack of formal training.
Weapons first. Living in the wild, the only weapons that would be readily available would be handmade and crude. Wooden/knapped-stone-tipped spears, leather slings (maybe bolas), stone-flake knives and handaxes, and crude bows with stone-tipped arrows. While one can get -good- in using these sorts of weapons in their own way, they would be sorely lacking against someone who has formal training and actual technique. Stolen/found weapons would quickly suffer from lack of upkeep (a sword actually needs to be sharpened, inspected for rust, and oiled on at least a weekly basis, for example) and, again, lack of formal training would affect usage.
Knowledges next. While their forest/hunting lore would be top notch, any other civilized or military knowledge would be nearly non-existent.They might be able to track a deer for miles on a cold trail over flat rock, but they will have no idea how to run an army, balance a ledger, or anything along those lines. In fact, being in a city would be extremely unnerving. Crowds would also make them uneasy.

Still with me? Alright. Next item… alignments. Anti-Heroes are, almost always, Chaotic Good. They go their own way, they do their own thing, but in the end they're going to play hero. At their lowest, an Anti-Hero would be a Neutral Good… but they are still "Good". Flat Neutral characters tend to only care when and and only as long as they're being inconvenienced. As soon as the immediate problem is taken care of, they go back to farming their turnip. Or they're the seer/fortune teller/whatever that will give advice freely to both the hero and the villain. In general, researching into alignments would be a good idea.

Now we come to the part that will magically eat up the next six hours of your time. Don't worry, this part is likely to be at least a little bit fun. Tropes are tools, and not always bad (clicky clicky the linky linky). Go through TV Tropes, pick out everything that you feel applies to your character. Go through the list, make sure that you're okay with everything that comes up, both GOOD and BAD. If your list is super long (over twenty tropes) or the terms "Mary Sue/Marty Stu" keep popping up, you might want to consider rethinking your character a bit. A little bit of Mary Sue/Marty Stu is okay, but too much and you may find people not responding well to your character (most people find a big Mary/Marty to be intolerable to interact with). You might also come up with concepts that you like better than what you've already considered.

Finally… well… the messy part. Grammar, punctuation, sentence structure. Overall syntax. Sandbox RP, these tend to be ignored. But in a highly structured environment, these are extremely important… sometimes to the point where people will misunderstand you, with terrible consequences. My favorite example of this is the Grandma argument:
"Let's eat, Grandma!" – We're eating, with Grandma. This is a happy thing, since most Grandmas love to cook and they're good at it. And she probably made us cookies.
"Lets eat Grandma!" – We're eating Grandma. And cannibalism is frowned upon by most cultures.
Outside of RP, proper grammar, punctuation, and sentence structure is necessary for successful careers, so it's a good habit to get into in general. Prospective employers who get resumes that look like alphabet soup, tend to turn said resumes into paper airplanes and throw them down the hallway. Also, net-speak (or txt-speak) is also frowned upon in a structured setting. Mostly because it's considered OOCishness, and it's not how people naturally talk.

–-

And, that's it for now, really. I've already tossed enough on your plate, so feel free to digest and ask questions. No-one is excellent at RP in a structured setting their first go-around. This is a learning process.

Ok so i have edit the profile a bit read and see how you think. am still trying to get everything right. the main part im trying to do is Shadows's Childhood and i got agreat idea for it i just need more time and info to fit it in. also i might do a drawing of shadow to give u a hint of how he looks (i'm not the best drawer but ill do my best)

It's looking better already! There is a noticeable improvement from your original post :) If you are interested, I (or someone else) could go through and edit your spelling/grammar mistakes so you can see how it should be? That might be helpful as you will probably run into a Grammar Nazi or two in game…

Never be ashamed of your art! A few people in this shell have drawn and posted their characters before. I've drawn a pretty bad/ugly character sketch for someone before, we laughed at how awful it was… but it was the best I could do.

Haha thanks i could fix my grammer here but i been so busy lately and still trying to make sure that i'am able to pre order the game (and buy a T.V cause my old box T.V will not cut it)
but i'll try my best to do it. If i need help i'll ask and thanks again

Not a problem! I look forward to seeing everything when it's finished~

Oh, yay! I was starting to worry that I might've scared you off with the critique..!

And, yep, this is looking much better already. Keep up the good work, and just say if you have questions..!